The incredible essay of Brittani Stinson, the girl who got into 5 Ivies and Stanford has been making the rounds. The funny, off-beat essay about Costco is incredibly fun and we’ve had a chance to see it as well. And so, we are taking the chance to talk through why this essay was really successful.
1. She took a risk and it paid off
Costco is different. Costco is off-beat. Hell, placing your commonapp essay in Costco is just plain weird. When an admissions officer is accosted by a million essays, having an interesting essay can set you apart.
2. She got you from the word go
“Managing to break free from my mother’s grasp, I charged. With arms flailing and chubby legs fluttering beneath me, I was the ferocious two- year old rampaging through Costco on a Saturday morning.”
A good essay has a good beginning and Brittani has that! The action packed first line and the mention of Costco has you hooked. You’re curious about what’s happening next!
3. She subtly “shows” herself
Employing the ever-important “show don’t tell” technique, Brittani highlights her numerous interests.
“I adopted my exploratory skills, fine tuned by Costco, towards my intellectual endeavors. Just as I sampled buffalo-chicken dip or chocolate truffles, I probed the realms of history, dance and biology, all in pursuit of the ideal cart-one overflowing with theoretical situations and notions both silly and serious. I sampled calculus, cross-country running, scientific research, all of which are now household favorites. With cart in hand, I do what scares me; I absorb the warehouse that is the world. Whether it be through attempting aerial yoga, learning how to chart blackbody radiation using astronomical software, or dancing in front of hundreds of people, I am compelled to try any activity that interests me in the slightest.”
4. She keeps her focus narrow
Instead of going ALL over the board in terms of her characteristics, Brittani focuses on her curiosity thus keeping the focus narrow, an essential part of a 650 word essay.
“Perusing the aisles gave me time to ponder. Who needs three pounds of sour cream? Was cultured yogurt any more well-mannered than its uncultured counterpart? Costco gave birth to my unfettered curiosity.“
5. She has fun
You truly can’t help but like Brittani at the end of this essay, mostly because she has fun with it!
But you don’t need to try to mimic Brittani’s essay. Understand what she did well but keep your essay focused on something important to you! To check out the full essay, see Business Insider.
HOWEVER, note one thing. The essay alone didn’t get Brittani into college. She had an incredible GPA, speaks fluent Portuguese and Spanish and did a number of great extracurriculars. Check out her amazing qualifications here – Brittani’s Qualifications.